The Party’s Over

Going thru the motions
Burning out inside
Questioning if I want 
to live or die
Seems to me
Life's become
Just a  shell of its former self

Walking round in a daze
That envelopes all that once lived
Oh I want to cry
Not sure if its passion or pain

Help me god
Don't let me down
Struggling to break free
Of this insipid insanity
Trying to escape this prison
I've fallen into

How to escape
old feelings coming back
Memories of a dark past
Can't go down that path again
Can't betray myself once more

Reach for the truth
Hold onto my soul
Do what I know is best for me
Its not failure 
If I can learn something about myself
and finally break the chain 

I did it once before
A leap of faith and I was
Mightily rewarded
Time to summon the courage once more
time to be myself I'm sure

(October 2016)